Mitt Romney Announces his Running Mate

Romney expected to announce his Uniton twin Mitt as his new running mate.
The tale of two Romney's, or Mormon trick #17

Anyone who watches the HBO show "Big Love", is very aware just how creepy and strange the Mormon religion is. The fact that Mitt Romney has hidden his other wives and children does not protect him from true Americans that know the truth about his wacky religion. But what has been hidden from the public is the knowledge of the Mormon planet Uniton that rotates on the opposite side of the sun making it impossible for astronauts to discover it. Uniton is very much like earth, in fact every one has a double on Uniton. Mitt Romney's twin, TTim, has just arrived to earth to help Mitt win!

For the last few months Mitt has only been able to communicate with TTim through a magic mirror hidden in the Mormon cathedral in Salt Lake, but TTim has taken matters into his own hands by drinking an elixir that was perfected by Joseph Smith to allow inter-planet travel. "I am here to help my twin conquer this America" said an enthusiastic TTim at his first press conference.

The two latter went to a meet and greet at a local Mcdonald's. A strange moment occurred when TTim tried to order baby guts and pigs blood, with an abortion shake, before Mitt could explain that earth Mcdonald's only serves hamburgers and french fries.

So far the press is in love with the charming fish out of water from Uniton. They laughed when he bit a baby instead of kissing it, and it is pretty cute that  being from the perfect Mormon planet Uniton TTim just has never met anyone from another religion or race outside of his own. "He thinks a jew is a little cave dwelling rodent, and he just was flabbergasted when I showed him a picture of Barak Obama." Joked Mitt to reporters.

Mitt has not yet announced that TTim will be his running mate, but he did quib two Romney's are better then one.

Comments

[Tyler]

You're stupid if you think Big Love represents Mormons at all.

[Jabe]

The next time a Republican attempts to besmirch Barack Obama or Mitt Romney by referencing their religious upbringing, the reply should be that Republican President Dwight Eisenhower was reared as a Jehovah's Witness, ...

http://jwbookstore.bravehost.com/books/eisenhower.html